Tuesday, June 28, 2016

The Case of the Cat in the Morning Time...

Lola is a creature of habit.  Her morning routine is so predictable, I could set my coffeemaker by her.
I get up at approximately 6am and creak down the stairs (my knees creak, not the stairs).  
Lola hears me and moves from the couch, where she's been slumbering, to the kitchen. 
As I make the coffee, she stands in front of the refrigerator to wait. 
She is waiting for fresh, ice cold water in her "inconvenient bowl". 
There is a little blue glass bowl that sits along the wall in the kitchen by the fridge. 
It is always in the way. 
I can’t count how many times someone has kicked the inconvenient bowl, spilling water all over the floor. 
I blame my daughter for that one; she started the "water by the fridge" thing. 
Lola’s water bowl and food are located in the laundry room, out of the way. 
My daughter made her feel so special, she now requires water in two locations. 
After I begrudgingly fill her water bowl and gush over her cute way of looking up at me, I get my coffee and sit down to check email and read the newspaper. 
When I do this, Lola parks nearby to do some personal cleansing. 
And by personal, I mean private. 
I don't want to see or hear her personal cleansing this early in the morning. 
Honestly, there is no good time for that, so I wave her away. 
Lola proceeds to walk around the house meowing about something.
 I imagine she is upset that I interrupted her bath – again.
When Lola’s done wandering and meowing, she proceeds to the bathroom to tell her friend in the mirror all about it. 
She jumps on the toilet, then onto the pedestal sink and gazes in the mirror to have a loud, mad conversation with that other cat. 
It's like "coffee with friends" but angrier…and crazier.
Either Lola thinks we keep her nemesis in the bathroom or, she has a very compliant friend who doesn't eat her food or drink her precious refrigerator water.
Her friend only shows her face when Lola wants to see her, or when she needs to gripe about her housemates. 
Or perhaps Lola’s bragging or laughing about how well she has “the staff” trained.  During the last heat wave, I found myself dropping ice cubes in her refrigerator water as if she were the queen of England or at the very least, the royal feline.  (don’t judge me)
Yes, she is surely laughing at us to her friend in the mirror.
When Lola’s rant is over, she finds a comfy place to nap...usually on the couch or in a sunbeam. 
She must need rest after such a busy morning, bossing her people around and arguing with the mirror cat. 
It must be exhausting to deal with the utterly predictable humans she's trained to do her bidding.  

When the sun rises, she’ll do it all again…

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